My thoughts on the matter don’t matter, at least I don’t think. My initial thought was one I’ve had for well over a decade. I’ve decided against it and figured “It’s Just Joe” is more appropriate.
As it is. It’s just Joe..it’s just him. But “just” doesn’t sit well with me, because there is so much there, so much to unpack. It’s not intentional and not for show, at least I don’t think it is. It hasn’t seemed to be in the past, so why would it be now? It’s almost like this thing, need/want something that stems from childhood. I just don’t know.
It’s just Joe. Benign, forgiving, receptive, so receptive, but to what end? Where is the cutoff? Where is the payback? Gaslighting? Abuse? My words twisted and gnarled to benefit the other? Things coming home to roost? Etc… When, where, why, how? I understand nothing, and…
It’s just Joe. It just is. I think about choices and decisions and everything in general and it boils down to HIM. It’s not an obsession, he isn’t, but most certainly a curiosity. I’m intrigued and, yet, not. I go back and forth.
It’s just Joe, this person that altered my existence greatly by their mere presence. I don’t know. I don’t know what to say about Joe. There’s a bit of frustration there. Perpetual, absolute perpetual, longing. A near desperate desire for something, anything, and not getting it. But then I remember…
It’s just Joe.
It Does Art 