Every year I do the Sketchbook Project offered by the Art House Co-Op in Brooklyn, NY. And every year I don’t send a damn thing in. Well, last year I did. I think. It’s just that I get so excited about it and then completely drop the ball because of a variety of factors: fear, fear of being judged, fear of…being judged. And fear. Of being judged.
It (me) = Total Wuss.
I think that’s what it is. Plus, I feel like I have absolutely zilch to offer. Who wants to see drawings of dismembered humans whispering secrets to other, naked, humans surrounded by red ribbons? No one, that’s who. I haven’t drawn that yet, but it’s in the works.
Until then, here is an in-progress picture (self-portrait type thing) of me whispering to me.
Not me, It, but the Self Portrait Project from Art House! It’s a 4 in x 4 in gallery wrapped canvas, primed and ready-to-go! I’m currently trying to figure out just how many of my personalities I can fit on this bad boy…
There’s also a note card explaining the rules – the same stuff on the site, just in paper form (easy for those of us that get cranky from staring at a screen for too long).
Who else has done this?! Tell me! If you haven’t yet, I still suggest you swing over to the Art House Co-op and see what projects they have going on there (for free and for dollars).
I signed up for 2 more! I had so much fun participating in the Fiction Project (even though I never mailed anything in!!) and just as much fun doing the Sketchbook Project (I did manage to send that one in). Now there are 2 more:
The Photo Response Project: http://www.arthousecoop.com/projects/photoresponse
The Self Portrait Project: http://www.arthousecoop.com/projects/selfportrait
The Photo Response one is free, but also full. The Self Portrait is $25 to enter. I have semi-started the Photo one (I chose the 5th photo – it was the only one that flooded my head with ideas at first glance) and I have no idea what I’m going to do for the Self Portrait. Or rather, which one of my personalities to represent…
There is one more project I just spotted that I think is quite interesting:
The Adventure Project: http://www.arthousecoop.com/projects/videoadventure
This one is free and 351 out of 1000 available spots are filled. 30 seconds to record an adventure. I’m trying to think of any adventures I could go on that would be filled with some sort of amusement or horror and set within 30 seconds. While I have been leaving my apartment a bit more lately (Go me! No fear!) I can’t think of anything that fits that criteria. All I can come up with is cleaning the litter boxes, but not only is that ick, it’s also more horror and amazement “How did Gabriel manage to pass that candy wrapper AND toothpick?!” My cats are freaking talented.
I’ll have to think on this…
So, yeah, go to the Art House Co-op and get yourself into something interesting.
Has gone the way of The Fiction Project.
This is Procrastinator 2: (Putting Off) Judgment Day. In this version, everyone (including Terminators) plops down on the sofa and nothing gets accomplished because they’re too busy watching American Dad and eating hummus with crackers. No one dies and Linda Hamilton doesn’t develop arms that could break Chuck Norris in two. Nope.
I should now tell you that I started writing this post on Saturday (2 days ago). On Saturday I was under the impression that my Sketchbook Project had to be post-marked by January 21st. Clearly I missed that, so I did what I typically do every time I feel defeated: I give up and internally give my self a “talking-to” about why I suck and how I need to take a course on the Meaning of Time and How it Works, or something like that.
Pouting, I opened Opera and headed over to the Art House Co-op to check out the other artists and see what was going on with them, and pout some more. When I did that, I saw a date: January 31st! I realized that I originally misread it (I do this frequently – numbers don’t look like they’re supposed to in my head) and I still had time!!!! Yesterday, I whipped out a bunch of drawings that don’t make one bit of sense and finished the Sketchbook Project. Today I put the book in a bubble sleeve, weighed it, slathered it with stamps, and shoved it in the mail-hole. Fingers crossed that the postage on USPS is correct!
Woohoo! This might be the first time I have completed something within the time frame I am given! I would celebrate, but I have to go watch It’s Always Sunny so I’ll celebrate later…
A couple weeks ago, I completed the Fiction Project for the Art House Co-op. Still haven’t mailed it in (of course), but at least it’s done and…yeah. At least it’s done.
This is the first “story” I wrote in it. It wasn’t even near any intentions I had and like most things, it just happened. Not a terrific start and a strange following to the page before it, but I left it anyway. The writing is sloppy and rather than using the pages as pages, I used both as one large page. Confusing, messy, and not at all what I wanted to do. Enjoy (if you can)!
For pages 6-7 going along with the unsettling and/or depressing theme, I jotted some quick words about a fat girl that wasn’t really fat (to sum it up in the most non-colorful, downright boring way possible).
Pages 8 and 9 aren’t even a story. At least not one with words. But it is something that I would love to forget (since my theme is “I’m Sorry I Forgot You”).
10 and 11. Sad blue eyes, even when he smiles his most perfect smile. Blond hair (now dark blond/brown). Sweet, sweet child with a lot of anger. Jes. I have so much hope for him. I do.
I think the story on 12-13 is pretty self explanatory. It’s titled “My Moment with You” and it was very difficult to write. It’s even difficult to share by posting it here. The man I mentioned still doesn’t know about the existence of the story or my feelings, but I’m sure they’ll eventually be uncovered. When I wrote it the timing was perfect, in a way. Near the end, while writing my apology, I was experiencing what is written. The time of night, how I felt, everything. I didn’t go back to read over it for several days, and when I did, I found a few misspellings and things I wouldn’t have said had I not been in that state of mind. A big part of me wants to edit it, but I can’t allow myself to do that. It’s painful and makes me feel incredibly vulnerable, but I think it would be unfair to alter it, even for those reasons. So it stays as is.
I will be posting more of the project as I touch up the scans.
And has been…for a couple weeks!! I just haven’t mentioned it because I haven’t done any work in it yet. The reason I haven’t done any work in it yet is because I just finished illustrating THE FICTION PROJECT! I am SO horrible with these things. Thankfully Art House Co-op will still take my book. It won’t go on tour, but that’s cool because that wasn’t the point of me doing the Fiction Project anyway.
Since I’m terrible at most things having to do with paying attention, I didn’t realize that the sketchbook would be so much smaller than the fiction book. It has much better paper, though, and I am kind of excited about the size. Depending on my mood, I either have too much workspace or not enough. The size of the sketchbook is enough that I won’t be limited but also won’t be overwhelmed. It’s all good.
I haven’t finished my paper mache arm, yet. Things went awry in real life and I’ve not had a chance to get back to it. Soon, though. Soon. I need to see it finished and heft it about.
One thing I did manage to nearly complete (nearly completing things is a big step for me) is a painting that my friend, A wrote a poem about. I wanted to give it to him, but first I wanted to touch it up. I managed to do that! I also varnished it and now all I need to do is ship it to him. That’s the part that I was supposed to do earlier this week, but that’s another thing that was tossed to the side when life hit the fan! Soon…very soon!
That’s all I have for now. I’m not sure why but my head has been flooded with ideas and images that I need to do (I like to refer to them as “visions” because they feel like it, whether it’s when I’m dreaming or awake and they sort of flash in my brain and stick). Notepad has come in very handy for this. First I must ship out A’s painting. Then I must send the Fiction Project. Then I will get back to my own thing (the arm, the visions, etc…) while also working on the Sketchbook Project. All things will fall into place…they just have to.
I finished writing in my Fiction Project book last night. The last story is completed and now I just need to illustrate it and send it. I contacted the staff at Art House Coop to make sure they would still accept my project even though I am really, really late. I know that it won’t go on tour, but that’s okay because the whole point of me doing it was to actually complete something. As usual, I’m running behind, but that disappointment is balanced out by the weird sense of accomplishment I get every time I get closer to sending it. Oh, and they will still accept it.
I will be signing up for the Sketchbook Project today (or tomorrow). That isn’t due until January 2012, so I’m pretty sure I have time. I only had a bit over a month to do the Fiction Project because I didn’t know about it until 3 days before registration ended. I got the book sometime in April.
So, yeah. For the past week, while working on the FP, I take breaks more often just to do quick drawings that aren’t related to the project at all. They’re not anything but ways of relaxing and exercising my hand. As always, the “meaningless doodles” are potentially vulgar and sensorially offensive.
On Saturday I realized that the Fiction Project had to be there by May 16th, not just postmarked. I’m so disappointed in myself, however I will still be sending it. It won’t go on tour, but that’s okay…it is important for me to finish it and send it. To actually complete something!
I was looking through my sketchbook (unrelated to The Sketchbook Project, which I have yet to register for) and have really been in the mood to take some of the ideas and put them on “good” paper with “good” supplies. Either watercolors or colored pencil…not sure which, yet, but I’m looking forward to being completely finished with the Fiction Project so I can work on some drawings.
Going back to the Fiction Project, I wrote 4 short stories on Friday night that I still need to copy into the book (avec illustrations). By the middle of the 4th story I was so exhausted that I was hitting the backspace key more than any other one. When I read through them on Saturday, I realized that I must have started getting tired during the 2nd story because anything past the first one was total shit! I rewrote the second and read it to JD twice. He didn’t get it the first time ’round, but really enjoyed it the second time (I think it’s because I have a nasty habit of stopping to explain something, and I didn’t do that the second time).
JD is terrific in so many ways, but I will admit that one of the things I appreciate most about him is that he has such a fantastic imagination and he’s deeply creative. Any time I want something read over, he’s the first person I go to because of these abilities. Some of the stories in my Fiction Project I’ve gone over with him before I entered them in the book…I’m excited to put these 4 in there today.
Whew! Hopefully I will be done today and can have JD mail it out tomorrow or, since he has Wednesday off, I may mail it out then.
A fictional project! Next Monday, May 16th, is when the book must be postmarked. And I’m still.not.done.
I was able to spill a few things on the pages, but I have a long way to go and not much in my head. At least not anything suitable.
I need some inspiration or…something. I need to just do it (as Nike frequently suggests).
I am a procrastinator. A horrible one. Thankfully, Art House Co-op has extended the deadline for the Fiction Project from May 1st to May 16th! Unfortunately, extended deadlines enable me to be at a standstill and continue to put things off. I’m not going to allow myself to do that, though! I have a lot of empty space left (a LOT) and not much time to fill it up.
Inspiration comes quite easy, but motivation does not. I know what I want to do, but I don’t know how to word it or express it. Another lesson in not being so hard on myself and not worry about perfection!