A couple weeks ago, I completed the Fiction Project for the Art House Co-op. Still haven’t mailed it in (of course), but at least it’s done and…yeah. At least it’s done.
This is the first “story” I wrote in it. It wasn’t even near any intentions I had and like most things, it just happened. Not a terrific start and a strange following to the page before it, but I left it anyway. The writing is sloppy and rather than using the pages as pages, I used both as one large page. Confusing, messy, and not at all what I wanted to do. Enjoy (if you can)!
For pages 6-7 going along with the unsettling and/or depressing theme, I jotted some quick words about a fat girl that wasn’t really fat (to sum it up in the most non-colorful, downright boring way possible).
Pages 8 and 9 aren’t even a story. At least not one with words. But it is something that I would love to forget (since my theme is “I’m Sorry I Forgot You”).
10 and 11. Sad blue eyes, even when he smiles his most perfect smile. Blond hair (now dark blond/brown). Sweet, sweet child with a lot of anger. Jes. I have so much hope for him. I do.
I think the story on 12-13 is pretty self explanatory. It’s titled “My Moment with You” and it was very difficult to write. It’s even difficult to share by posting it here. The man I mentioned still doesn’t know about the existence of the story or my feelings, but I’m sure they’ll eventually be uncovered. When I wrote it the timing was perfect, in a way. Near the end, while writing my apology, I was experiencing what is written. The time of night, how I felt, everything. I didn’t go back to read over it for several days, and when I did, I found a few misspellings and things I wouldn’t have said had I not been in that state of mind. A big part of me wants to edit it, but I can’t allow myself to do that. It’s painful and makes me feel incredibly vulnerable, but I think it would be unfair to alter it, even for those reasons. So it stays as is.
I will be posting more of the project as I touch up the scans.
I finished writing in my Fiction Project book last night. The last story is completed and now I just need to illustrate it and send it. I contacted the staff at Art House Coop to make sure they would still accept my project even though I am really, really late. I know that it won’t go on tour, but that’s okay because the whole point of me doing it was to actually complete something. As usual, I’m running behind, but that disappointment is balanced out by the weird sense of accomplishment I get every time I get closer to sending it. Oh, and they will still accept it.
I will be signing up for the Sketchbook Project today (or tomorrow). That isn’t due until January 2012, so I’m pretty sure I have time. I only had a bit over a month to do the Fiction Project because I didn’t know about it until 3 days before registration ended. I got the book sometime in April.
So, yeah. For the past week, while working on the FP, I take breaks more often just to do quick drawings that aren’t related to the project at all. They’re not anything but ways of relaxing and exercising my hand. As always, the “meaningless doodles” are potentially vulgar and sensorially offensive.
On Saturday I realized that the Fiction Project had to be there by May 16th, not just postmarked. I’m so disappointed in myself, however I will still be sending it. It won’t go on tour, but that’s okay…it is important for me to finish it and send it. To actually complete something!
I was looking through my sketchbook (unrelated to The Sketchbook Project, which I have yet to register for) and have really been in the mood to take some of the ideas and put them on “good” paper with “good” supplies. Either watercolors or colored pencil…not sure which, yet, but I’m looking forward to being completely finished with the Fiction Project so I can work on some drawings.
Going back to the Fiction Project, I wrote 4 short stories on Friday night that I still need to copy into the book (avec illustrations). By the middle of the 4th story I was so exhausted that I was hitting the backspace key more than any other one. When I read through them on Saturday, I realized that I must have started getting tired during the 2nd story because anything past the first one was total shit! I rewrote the second and read it to JD twice. He didn’t get it the first time ’round, but really enjoyed it the second time (I think it’s because I have a nasty habit of stopping to explain something, and I didn’t do that the second time).
JD is terrific in so many ways, but I will admit that one of the things I appreciate most about him is that he has such a fantastic imagination and he’s deeply creative. Any time I want something read over, he’s the first person I go to because of these abilities. Some of the stories in my Fiction Project I’ve gone over with him before I entered them in the book…I’m excited to put these 4 in there today.
Whew! Hopefully I will be done today and can have JD mail it out tomorrow or, since he has Wednesday off, I may mail it out then.
A fictional project! Next Monday, May 16th, is when the book must be postmarked. And I’m still.not.done.
I was able to spill a few things on the pages, but I have a long way to go and not much in my head. At least not anything suitable.
I need some inspiration or…something. I need to just do it (as Nike frequently suggests).
I missed the boat for the Sketchbook Project. I remember finding it online and I was thrilled that something like this existed and I really wanted to do it. But then the idea drifted from my head. I was still on meds, therefore still not “there”. So in March I found it again (remembering that I had wanted to do it) but since I was late, I saw “The Fiction Project” and, with 3 days left to sign up, I jumped on it.
The Fiction Project is similar to the Sketchbook Project, except you write stories. Or poems. Really, it seems you can do whatever you want, as long as you try to keep a bit over half the book written rather than drawn. Writing has always been a large part of my life. When I would think about what I wanted to do (not what other people wanted me to do) being an artist was always first and being a writer came in as a “second first”.
I received the blank cashier’s book a couple of weeks ago and I have a whopping 9 pages done. I have about a week to get it sent back to them (must be postmarked by May 1st). I tore out 4 pages because, being a perfectionist, I couldn’t get it the way I wanted it. I’ve stopped doing that. It’s far from perfect, far from what I would like it to be, but it still gets the point across. I’ve used watercolors, marker, ink, acrylic, and pencil. The paper in the book is very light, so it’s certainly not made for watercolors or really anything beyond a marker. I don’t care. It works.
The theme I chose is “I’m Sorry I Forgot You”. Out of all of them, I felt that one would be most appropriate. There are a lot of ways that theme can be applied, so I’m trying to work them all.
Here is the first page of my book…a page of notes. I like order…at first. I created a page of short notes thinking that I would be able to organize the book and make everything neat and tidy, but then my reality hit and since I’m none of those things, neither is the book. It’s a catch-all of thoughts. Chaotic.
This is the back of the first page:
The last picture I’ll post is the page opposite of the above page. It’s just a quick illustration relevant to my inability to always decipher reality from fantasy.
More to come!